I have always felt that “Helicopter Parents” are made and not born …. and a very logical and predictable result of the many problems of both our society and our often dysfunctional educational system.
They are made by the simple recognition that children and sometimes ones ‘adult children’ need some advice, financial help or comfort in meeting the challenges of today’s world. Sometimes the inmates are running the schools… and this is when a child may need help, intervention and representation.
Have you ever seen a school ‘circle the wagons’ to protect a recognized ‘inappropriate’ teacher? Where does a child then go for help in dealing with the bureaucracy? Representation and advocacy must then come from outside the system.
The biggest concern for administrators is in dealing with parents at the college level as discussed by Patricia Somers. Two opposing forces are at work: parents who feel they have some rights for information since they may be bankrolling their student, versus administrators who had hoped making all 18 year olds ‘adults’ would circumvent any involvement by parents. Wishful thinking by both sides.
It is clear that some parents are way too involved in their adult-children’s lives … but those folks have been around forever. As a result, most parents have wonderful stories about relationshsips with their in-laws. However, what appears to be new is the greater scrutiny given by parents to higher education. Most Americans view higher education, universities and the professorate with far less esteem than in the past. It is well deserved. Examples from the slow justifiable termination of Ward Churchill to the unjust firing of the Harvard President Lawrence Summers for political incorrectness, lead many people to question the ‘value’ of today’s American education. Of course, many of us have our own personal stories.
My take: it is very probable that with the emphasis of smaller American families, parents are distributing more of their energies into their one, two or three children. Much like a result of China’s one baby policy where millions of pampered male baby ‘Buddhas” were produced, parents are working overtime to ensure that their ‘legacy’ is maintained with their diminished brood.
My advice: Universities are far from responsive to the needs of students, parents, employers or the American people…. at first blush, a more ‘market driven’ curriculum and better ‘customer service’ department might be a step in the right direction.
Roger Freberg
When you look at the state of our educational system… it’s hard not to understand why the military holds such an attraction to our youth. A ‘meritocracy’ has tangible value.
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