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Can women and men EVER be just ‘friends’?

the orignal debate.... can men and women be friends?Ranking up there as one of the top topics on the internet… behind sex, dating and marriage is the simple question:

“Can Men and Women just be friends?”

“when Harry met Sally” the underlying theme is exactly that… “Can two friends sleep together and still love each other in the morning?”.

The movie provides their own sort of answer… but people tend to respond to this question based on what they bring into the situation.

Here’s a few ‘answers’ to the question I found on the internet… but search the net for yourself… some of the solutions are very amusing:

1) I told him/her that I just ‘wanted to be friends’ because I definitely don’t want  to go farther with this person.

2) I told him/her that I wanted to be ‘friends’… because then I would have more access to them … and could bump the relationship up in the future.

3) I told him/her I wanted to be friends because that’s like saying,”let’s do lunch’, then I would never call.

I think the following is the best lines of the ‘When Harry met Sally”:

Harry Burns: You realize of course that we could never be friends.
Sally Albright: Why not?
Harry Burns: What I’m saying is – and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form – is that men and women can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Sally Albright: That’s not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
Harry Burns: No you don’t.
Sally Albright: Yes I do.
Harry Burns: No you don’t.
Sally Albright: Yes I do.
Harry Burns: You only think you do.
Sally Albright: You say I’m having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Harry Burns: No, what I’m saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.
Sally Albright: They do not.
Harry Burns: Do too.
Sally Albright: They do not.
Harry Burns: Do too.
Sally Albright: How do you know?
Harry Burns: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright: So, you’re saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail ’em too.
Sally Albright: What if THEY don’t want to have sex with YOU?
Harry Burns: Doesn’t matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
Sally Albright: Well, I guess we’re not going to be friends then.
Harry Burns: I guess not.
Sally Albright: That’s too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.

Well, this all is a bit over the top, but for those of you who BELIEVE that men and women COULD BE friends… think of it this way, scientists have shown that men think about sex every 51 seconds… so some of the spare time could be used to think about making friends…

However, all is not lost, there are some environments where men and women work together and it appears that a good working relationship or ‘friendship’ evolves… such as in the army. However, it is important to remember that the penalties for crossing the friendship line in the military are severe… you can get kicked out for adultery alone.

So it really depends on what efforts are in place to support workplace discipline. To make this point clear my wife (and friend) Laura in her psychology class will say that almost any behavior can be modified or changed with the right reward and punishment scheme. Imagine — she says — that it is determined that illegal parking warrants capital punishment… students will respond saying,’well …. it’s only 25 miles…. and it’s a good day for a walk!’

‘Platonic friendships’ can also work bnetween men and women… but it requires more effort than most realize…. and usually the right environment.

Here’s what other folks are saying on this very popular issue:

MedicineNet.com
Psychology Today
from a Christian Perspective
Confused
from Cosmo

There’s literally a ton of stuff on the net… Google showed over 36 million entries… I don’t have quite enough time to view them all… but from my observation, it could be summarized that a woman would be fortunate to have the following real male friends in her life… 1) her husband 2) her father 3) her brothers and possibly 4) other related men. Outside of this small universe, I haven’t seen it happen.

So, for now, let’s just be friends.

 

Roger Freberg

 

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the veil a “mark of separation”

a whale of a veil

 

the British have had — according to press — a whale of a problem with the ‘veil’ required by Muslem men to prove chastity, etc. although from my reading, the powerful ‘veil’ hasn’t reduced the incidence of rape or the beating of women. Besides, the real problem with a mask of any kind is that people wonder what you are trying to hide… it looks dishonest.

Although to our untrained western eyes, the veil is a symbolic way of separating half of the population from full participation in society… in reality… well… it keeps half of society apart… let me put it another way… which is easier to do : 1) name the ten top Muslim women in history ? or 2) name the fifty most influential non-Muslim women in the world today? It is clear in which ‘culture’ women have greater influence and participation.

here’s what selected others say:

Daily Pundit
THE YELLING bOX
Jonatha Murray

Confused:
News from a Greek Bulgarian

wackos:
Islamaphobia Watch

In our post 911 world, a lot has changed and questions are being asked… how important to the success of any society is assimilation? What are the limits to tolerance? When does a religion cross the line and become indistinquishable from a military and political entity?

 

Roger Freberg

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Gil Burnham — “Weenie Man of the week!”

Gilbert Burnham
There is a ‘uniform’ for most of our liberal intellectual elite. You can recognize many of the women… they sport what is lovingly referred to as ‘man hair’, wear flowing skirts or jeans, no makeup and the requisite frown.

Male leftist college professors tend to wear a beard… although there are those trying ‘to blend in’ that look almost indistinquishable from male ‘meat eaters.’

This brings us to our “Weenie man of the Week!”. This guy is probably not a ‘meat eater’… because he went to a vegetarian university…. His name is Professor Gilbert Burnham and his one great current contribution to the “Bash & Blame America First” committee continues to be his reporting of incredible death figures in Iraq, despite evidence and support. However, it looks like — once again — he lacks credibility… even with the government of Iraq.

The Iraqi government is also questioning (Gilbert Burnham’s) survey results. The Manchester (U.K.) Guardian reported: The Iraqi government said the report’s death toll was “inflated” and “far from the truth”…..  An Iraqi government spokesman, Ali al-Dabbagh, said in a statement that the toll in the report “exceeds the reality in an unreasonable way.”

Our friends on the left like to introduce this sort of thing right before elections as they did in 2004… and only after the election does the report get fully discredited. Pajamas Media caught up with the author for an interview… and clearly Dr. Burnham ‘spin’ is amusing. They were not able to totally bare the old professor… but others did a pretty good job… and their links are below.

So, where did all the money come to run this study? It is reported that the major funder of the new study was the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

Here’s what others are saying:

UNbelievers:

Major Statistics
Dumb Looks Still free
SEIXON
Gateway Pundit
Decision ’08
America’s majority

Believers:

Rahul Mahajan
Majikthise
Really out there
Australian Radio Man

Well, Gilberto, you have won a sizable honor… the distiquished ‘big weenie’!
You just remind me of

Remember “What about BoB?”, Gilbert?… I don’t know if it just the name… or the ‘look’… you just remind me of ‘Gil’… except he was in a plastic bag and you’re in a state of denial.

Roger Freberg
 

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American P.O.W.’s in Vietnam sue John Kerry!

Vietnam fun in a Jeep
Wow!

I didn’t realize that some folks were trying to silence those who spoke out against John Kerry’s Anti-Vietnam War legacy. I always heard that they don’t put cement shoes on you and drop you in the Chapaquitic river anymore … they just sue you and take all your money away.

Anyway, it appears that these ol’ vets continued to fight the Kerry supporters and after ‘winning’ the suits against them… they have slapped them back with a suit of their own.

They claim that they are going to get John Kerry to ‘come clean’… they have formed an educational organization to get the real story of their Vietnam experience to the American people. They summarize their mission thusly:

 

Vietnam Veterans Legacy Foundation

is an organization created to better educate and inform the public about the Vietnam War, its events, its history, and the men and women who sacrificed to serve their country 

I also enjoyed some of the quotes on their site that the infamous Jane Fonda said while in Vietnam:

July 26, 1972: Fonda 

“We have understood that we have a common enemy -– U.S. imperialism. We have understood that we have a common struggle and that your victory will be the victory of the American people and all peace-loving people around the world.”

“Recently in the United States we’ve been doing a lot of political propaganda work among the students and the soldiers with your Vietnamese comrades.”

————–

Well, it’s been over thirty years since the Vietnam War and thanks to those who returned , they are starting to set the record straight… it’s far easier now to see who are our friends … and our enemies.

Roger Freberg

 

 

 

 

 

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November 2006 Elections — It’s about Freedom at Home, too!

Young Cuban Boy taken from Home by U.S. Administrators against his will and returned to Cuba 

Here we are at election time again… and we all have the opportunity to choose who our government selects to go to war against.

The choice is pretty clear to me.

If the Democrats win — as in the Clinton years — they probably will drop Iraq et all and they will opt to go after ‘soft targets’, such as the American people. Oh, you say that couldn’t happen? Allow me to refresh your memory.

I am sure you remember the poor unfortunates targeted in those years… like the cult incinerated in Waco, Texas or the taunting and shooting of a survivalist mother of an infant in Idaho. And in case you forgot the picture of the young Cuban boy yanked from family and returned to Cuba… I have included it in this blog. There’s a lot more.

Okay, true confession time, Since I was a young boy taking my first gun safety course… I have been an off and on again member of the National Rifle Association. The NRA is a good group contrary to popular press. Although unsettling, I have had several opportunities to defend myself and others thanks to a hand gun.

There’s a video of a tiny woman being roughed up and thrown against her china and then her handgun is taken away… oh yes, this was done by the police in New Orleans. So, here’s a link to the video on a new site :Take a long hard look at the section titled “Brutally Disarmed” on www.givethemback.com.You’ll see unbelievable violence caught by Fox News when police entered the residence of sixty-year old, Patricia Konie, and demanded that she evacuate her home.  You’ll see them body-slam this tiny woman into a wall-sending dishes flying-then confiscate her firearm and drag her from her home.You never saw this footage and you never will see it on ABC, NBC or CBS. You never will see the photos or read about these crimes in The New York Times, The Washington Post or any of the major dailies. 

  

 

Think it can’t happen where you live? Ask your local mayor & police chief what plans they have in the event of civil unrest or disaster. It just may include a knock on your house… if they knock at all.

The November Election is really about whether or not we continue to fight for freedom abroad… and at home… it’s as simple as that.

Roger Freberg