Category: Manliness

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Love starts & maintains with a simple kindness

Love starts with many simple kindnesses

Every newspaper has them… folks who offer their advice on love, sex and relationships. Well, at the risk of offering unwanted advice: they are all so much a waste of time. Love is about sincere kindness and sensing the needs of the other person.

Here is an example that I noticed the other day:

While at the international airport in Los Angeles, I noticed a nice middle aged couple tucked away sitting in an alcove near. He was  obviously a bit sleepy and without saying anything, his partner stood up and moved to a large pillar where she sat on the ground. She motioned to him to place his head on her lap. He didn’t need much encouragement. He fell asleep with her gentle hands rubbing his temples.

People walked by and the reactions were interesting. Some were amused… and some were not. A few women looked on as if they were observing some sort of primitive example of male domination … and a few men passed by impressed by what they thought was a true alpha male at work.

What was transacting was a simple recognition of a need and the offering of a simple kindness…. some call this love. I have always felt that love starts with recognizing simple needs … and offering simple solutions.

Laura has always been there for me… even when I didn’t realize how sleepy I was.

Roger Freberg

The above picture is of Laura and I back in high school in 1970 sharing a bit of lunch… and yes.. my head was resting in her lap even way back then.

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Controlling Anonymity on the Internet

contolling the world of anonymity

Psychologists and anyone who studies human nature knows that anonymity can bring out the worst in people. This is why ‘terrorists’ love masks. Yes, there are those wonderful anonymous good Samaritans in life and on the net… but they are rare. Many folks put on the hood of evil to let their own personal demons out on the world and it amazes me who these people are in reality. Unfortunately, many of these are just average folks… with issues.

I know one athletic board that is frequented by young athletes and their coaches that has since descended into meaninglessness due to anonymous bullying. Controlling bad behavior and eliminating anonymity keeps a board useful, informative and productive. Posters & coaches who have not earned their laurels on the field try to claim them on boards… unfortunately, bullying isn’t always limited to the bad coaches and less accomplished athletes. Athletics — I fear — has its share of psychopaths.

Cyber bullies and cyber gangs can dominate chat rooms and various posting boards if left uncontrolled. Their acrimonious methods and unethical and abusive tactics are much the same. However, regardless of their behavior they are all masked in anonymity. The better boards control for this by demanding verifiable emails and personal data from posters. There are some boards where nastiness occurs even when you KNOW who they are… but they’d no doubt be worse were they anonymous.

It takes effort to keep boards focused… but it benefits everyone.

Roger Freberg

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Wine, Song & Marilyn Merlot… or am I repeating myself?

Odd Wines from around the world!

Marilyn Merlot and the Naked Grape by  Peter F. May  is a wonderful little book simply about interesting wines from around the world with… unusual names. Marilyn Merlot by  Napa Wine Company  is a “…leggy red offer(ing) blackberry, chocolate, and smokey toast flavors.” ‘Negociant’ David Wright’s “The Naked Grape” is a ‘collection’ of hand picked wines from various vintners. Peter’s Book is packed with interesting stories, illustrations and reviews…  a great read.

The  “Goats do Roam”  story is an amusing one as is their ever present label here in America. However, I can see why the folks producing  “Cotes du Rhone”  tried to get the label banned in France. In California, we have our own local favorite, a blended star, entitled “Cotes du Robles” (38% Mourvedre, 35% Syrah & 27% Grenache) by Eberle Winery ( one snobbish reviewer said it would be ‘great with a pizza’… but then, I say, so is Margaux).

The Goats du Roam family of various wines does house a ‘red’ with a familiar blend of Shiraz (90%), Pinotage (6.5%) and Mourvedre (3.5%).

Peter’s book contains quite a few wines that I would love to serve for the shock value alone. Not much is left to the imagination with names like: Truck Stop Girl, Under the Table, Dancing Monkey, French Kiss, Big Ass Red …. and lastly d’Vine! ( stop! I have been PUN-ished enough!)

Buy the book … it’s great with Margaux and Pizza!

Roger Freberg

PS. Peter’s Book is pictured above next to my Concord Grapes — which the ‘experts’ say can’t grow in this part of the world.

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Harry Potter Survives and Thrives!!!? (maybe)

hmmmm.... is it too good to be true?

If you are a Harry Potter Fan, then the release of Book 7 has been anticipated for a long time. Supposedly the conclusion was developed back in 1999 and from the ‘leaks’ the ending should thrill the fans… and probably draw Snapish snarls from the critics. However, as with some forces of nature, critics might want to step aside or risk losing it all.

We have five books coming to our home — 2 deluxe editions, 2 standard from Scholastic ( the US Publisher) and one copy from the UK (Bloomsberry)… unfortunately… alas… none of them signed. However, I can see no one doing anything this weekend but reading “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.”

I won’t pass along the leaks… but they are out there along with a bunch of hints. The  New York Times came out with a tantalizing review  if you want some hints without the truth. But if you can’t stand it… the info is out there… plus a lot of false leads.

We’ll see if it comes true on Saturday!

Roger Freberg

PS… my wife Laura was right — if true — about Ron & Hermione… that’s all I am going to say!