Have you ever noticed how many people lie to themselves?… sometimes it’s about little things… and sometimes they evolve into huge whoppers! This is not so much about telling the truth as it is about not facing up to what appears evident.
This is also not about avoiding optimism or losing hope… this is confronting what is… not about confronting what will or might be. It’s about learning from one’s mistakes, recognizing problems and avoiding delusion. Looking at the world honestly — in my humble opinion — allows us to fully enjoy what life and family have to offer. If we can look honestly, then it is easier to talk honestly and expect the same from others.
Let’s just say, I know someone (no one in my immediate family, thank goodness)… that continually re-frames things they have done, said or have written, once they realize that it makes them appear less than they wish to be. It is especially amusing when they dispute their own email… but that is another story.
Unfortunately, one cannot change a pattern of behavior that has become a habit… unless someone really wants to change. Most professionals — for example — know that rehab doesn’t work unless the person involved really wants to change, make new friends and find a new life… which they seldom wish to do.
So, why am I writing this?… because it’s hard to see folks make the same mistakes over and over… all the while being miserable and blaming others for their misfortune. Looking in the mirror is a tough call for anyone… I’ve been there myself.
“Looking at the world honestly” is tough… but it makes making good decisions easier.
Roger Freberg